Seeking the thin blue line

Appointment Time

We had a three month wait for our initial consultation. Three months is a terribly long time to worry about something when you don’t really know what’s happening. I did research on the internet and read books, including Zita West’s Guide to Fertility and Assisted Conception (kindly loaned to me by NFC) and How to get Pregnant: The Zhai Programme for Successful Conception.  Dr Zhai’s book led us to the NFC where we started alternative therapy in Chinese herbs, acupuncture and nutrition. This gave us something constructive to do so we weren’t just waiting…. I hated being at the mercy of other people’s schedules.

Research prior to our appointment added to my anxiety. For example the list of conditions to be applicable for NHS IVF is long. No smoking, low BMI, how long you’d been trying and also living together. It felt like it had become someone else’s responsibility to decide if we were fit to be parents.

The appointment began to feel like a test to be on the ‘help to have a baby’ list that we could fail. I checked and rechecked dates for coming off the pill, how long we’d been trying, how long we’d lived together, when we bought our flat. I worried what information in our records would be checked and whether everything matched.

I got myself so worked up for that first appointment but actually I’m relieved to say it was absolutely fine. We had a consultant who was patient and informative and I interrogated him with my questions. We were lucky (if lucky is the right word) as we had a clear medical problem (N’s mumps and sperm count) and were put on the year long waiting list straight away.

I was referred for both a Hysterosalpingogram and a Gynaecology Pelvis Ultrasound just to be on the safe side. Whilst N got off with a brief manhandling of his testicles, I donned knitted knickers and had dye squirted up my lady parts whilst a student doctor watched. I was told I have a textbook uterus - I’m adding that to my CV under immaculate cervix. I also avoided an internal ultrasound thanks to my bladder being uncomfortably full (top tip - drink a gallon of water on the way to the hospital) - ovaries present and correct.

So I am good and ready to go, which I’m delighted about obviously, but it isn’t helping me get pregnant any quicker.

Women often get pregnant after the dye test, the result of a reproductive colonic I assume. I had my fingers crossed after that test. When I went to for the ultrasound with cool gel on my belly like on the telly, I hoped there might be something to see. Unfortunately it was too early in my cycle to see anything - “you’d be surprised how many women come in here and it shows they’re three weeks pregnant. You’ll be keeping your fingers crossed your period’s late I bet” said the consultant, and I was. Unfortunately it arrived that afternoon. Life can be cruel, but there’s always a good news story. I’m hoping that we become one soon.


Daisy x